Jesus was a harm reductionist. (reprint)

So in another life, I attended seminary. I wrote this article about Jesus being a harm reductionist. Haven't thought about this article in quite some time but am pretty darn steamed at the Christians who continue to misrepresent Jesus. You're welcome to post your thoughts...I'm pretty sure there are those who would disagree...and yes, it's a bit long....

Before I came to seminary, I used to supply condoms and lube to young people for a living.  It’s a paradox, I know.  Christians don’t do that kind of stuff, at the least the ones that I know don’t.  The Christians I know pretend that young people don’t have sex.  We pretend that abstinence-only education works.  We pretend that it’s okay to tell kids that condoms don’t work.  We pretend that young people are not following our example, telling them to do what we SAY not what we DO.  We pretend that sending kids messages about sex that say sex is bad and dirty is somehow going to save them from disease and unintended pregnancy.  We pretend that because we are not talking about sex that we are not sending messages to kids about sex.  We pretend that this is what Jesus would have us to do.

            Before I came to seminary, I used to supply condoms and lube to kids and every once in a while, someone would ask me, “Doesn’t your job conflict with your faith?”  And I would respond, “No.  Jesus was (and is) a harm reductionist.”  (Harm reduction is a simple concept.  It is the process of encouraging and affirming behaviors that decrease the risk associated with a particular behavior.  Most people are familiar with this concept in relation to needle exchange, where intravenous drug users can trade in their dirty “works” for clean “works” or cleaning agents like bleach in an effort to reduce transmission of blood borne diseases like HIV and Hepatitis.  Or the commercial sex worker who might continue to work the streets but who now gets her johns, or most of them, to use a condom.  It is allowing people to make their own choices and participating in what would be considered “risky” behaviors but offering, encouraging and affirming safer alternatives.)

            After you’ve seen your 3^rd or 4^th 15-year old contract HIV, no, after you’ve seen your 1^st 15-year old contract HIV, you realize that only offering kids “JUST SAY NO!” just doesn’t cut it.  You realize that this is serious business.  You realize that even though you would like for every kid you know to stay abstinent until they are in positive, healthy monogamous relationships (in my head that equals marriage but I know that’s not everybody’s take on it), the reality is that they are not.  The reality is that there are 12 year olds having sex.  The reality is that there are 13 years olds having babies.  The reality is that there are 14 year olds getting sexually transmitted diseases.  The reality is that there are 15 year olds contracting HIV.  And these are not just kids who are juvenile delinquents or on drugs, these are young people in yours and my church youth group, Black, White, Latino, and Asian, rich and poor, high academic achievers and athletes, hip hoppers and preppies.  These are your kids, and some day my kids, too.

            At that point you realize you have to advocate for comprehensive sexuality education, laying out all of the facts for young people so that they can develop some critical thinking skills and make choices for themselves.  You realize that you have to practice harm reduction when it comes to kids and sex even if you know that the possibility of being excommunicated from your church will become real because of it.  You have to tell kids about condoms and other forms of barrier and non-barrier protection and make sure they know how to use them properly.  You have to tell kids, “There are three things that can happen as a result of having sex: 1) Pregnancy 2) STDs, including HIV 3) Nothing at all.”  You have to ask the questions that embarrass the youth you know and give them answers about sex that most adults are afraid to answer. 

And you do all of this not only because you’ve seen a lot of terrible things but because you remember what you were doing at that age.  See, I started participating in sexual activity when I was 13.  I grew up in a stable home and was raised in a conservative church.  I am sure my mother is still pretending that I have not had sex because I am an unmarried daughter.  And I wonder if I had had an adult in my life who told me the real deal, who told me I would get horny, who taught me how to use a condom, who explained to me about choices, passive and active, who told me that I could be sexual without having intercourse, who affirmed who I was as a sexual being, maybe I would not have made some of the choices I have made and been through some of the horrible stuff I have been through because of those choices. 

            See, when you are a teenager and you become aware of yourself as a sexual being, then it is ALL about that.  Your whole life is about who likes you and who you like, and how far have you gone and how does that compare with your friends and are you fat and are you too fat for boys (or girls) to like you and why doesn’t the person you like like you back and ….  And because everyone is so hush-hush about sex you think that you should definitely be doing it and its fun because it’s forbidden and after all, you know everything, so why not.  And he doesn’t look like he has a disease.  And my best friend told me that his cousin told him that if he sticks his finger in his ear and gets some ear wax and then puts the finger with the ear wax in the girl’s vagina and it burns her, then she has an STD, so I have a fool proof way of finding that type of stuff out.  And I can keep from getting pregnant by shaking up a can of coke and spraying it up my vagina immediately after having sex, so no worries there.

            One night you get a phone call from a 17-year old kid in your youth group at church and after he has hemmed and hawed, he’ll ask you about emergency contraception.  He’ll tell you that all he and his girlfriend ever have is unprotected sex.  You will be torn about whether you should give him this information but you do it because you realize that he is turning to you for help and guidance and you have to give it to him.  You believe Jesus would do it.  You tell him that you do not advocate emergency contraception.  You tell him to call the local Planned Parenthood in the morning and that he and his girlfriend can receive care for free or little money there.  You tell him that if they decide to go that route that he had better be with her every step of the way.  You realize this is not the time to berate him for being irresponsible or for having sex in the first place.  You tell him that this will require a follow-up conversation about sex and relationships (including his relationship with Jesus) at a later date.  You thank God that this young person thought enough of you to call for help.  You pray that you did not let him down.  You follow-up.

            You reflect on the fact that you believe that Jesus is a harm reductionist.  You think about how none of the gospel stories ever talk about him forcing someone to do what he wanted them to do.  You think about how all of them offer grace, mercy and forgiveness without condemnation.  You think about how all of them offer choices.  You think about how Jesus loves you despite the choices you have made in your life.  You think about your own sexual journey and how it was a journey to harm reduction for you that has found completion in abstinence and advocacy.  You believe that was God’s grace covering you.  It affirms your belief that Jesus is a harm reductionist.  You know that Jesus would give out condoms, too.

Always remember, Jesus loves you. It doesn't matter who you are, what you've done or what your issues are. I'm living proof.